There was a dog, of the finest breed imaginable. With the softest fur, sleekest stride, and doe-like eyes; the kind of dog that movies are made about.
It’s proud owner loved to show it off; he strutted around the neighbourhood with his canine companion, proud and pleased as could be and when he was done strutting, he lovingly led it home, and settled it for dinner; a dinner of the choicest roots, herbs, wildflower and grass growing in the neighbourhood.
You see, it’s owner loved it to bits, and could not understand why his sterling doggy whined and moaned whenever he placed this awesome repast before it.
I mean, he must have thought, ‘What an ungrateful dog!’
After all, his father fed their pet goat with grass every day, and oh, what a thankful goat that was!
This owner cared for his dog in every way possible…just not in the way it NEEDED to be cared for.
And you may ask what kind of a jerk feeds a dog with grass?!
I asked that myself; but not of a fictional doggy owner, but of husbands and of wives.
Have you bothered to find out what your spouse really needs? Or are you stuck in the rut of how your parents did it or how your friends and colleagues are doing it? Are you forcing a dog to change its very character and start eating grass because you insist on feeding it thus?
That’s really like pouring water on a stone you see, because you might troll around congratulating yourself on being such a caring, sensitive Human, but you really haven’t made any impact on your spouse; and it’s not because they are ungrateful either- you just aren’t feeding them the right food!
Picture this scenario:
Boo thinks that massaging Babe’s feet every morning is the way to go; but Babe really needs Boo not to hurry out the door without saying, ‘I love you,’. She tries to appear to enjoy an early morning foot massage but the truth is it actually irritates her. Boo senses Babe’s discontent and is pissed that she is so ungrateful. But has Boo really taken the time to discover Babe’s preferred meal? I think not. And the dog continues to receive grass at mealtimes.
And then the whole issue of comparism breaks forth: the Goat-herd advises the Dog-Owner to keep serving grass; because it works for his goat!
‘No, bananas!’ Says he who owns a pet-monkey;
‘Have you tried chicken-feed?’ The poultry farmer inquires.
Hunger might compel the dog to feed on any of the above fares, but does it enjoy it? Inside, I think it continues to pine for what it really needs.
Your wife needs you to know her needs and your husband does too; don’t generalize or assume. Contrary to popular opinion, all men are not the same and you had better believe that no two women have exactly the same needs.
That dog won’t eat grass just because you sweated all morning to gather the choicest weeds and herbs in the vicinity or beyond!